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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2002 : 9:07:19 PM
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Well, I'm sitting here, completely bored out of my skull (my guitar taken away due to the fact that I'm grounded) So anyway, I thought this post would be fun. One of mine, during school, was walking through a packed hallway between classes, and tripping up, busting my ass. OR, falling at the top of the escalators, coming down with a huge THUMP in front of two hot girls. Having my voice cracking at such a high squeak while giving a a report during class. HAHAHAHAHA, those moments were great, once you take a second to look back on 'em. . . . .damn I'm bored. (Hasnt some one all ready posted something like this???)
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2002 : 9:32:23 PM
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i made fun of some kid's mom. i was astounded he was crying. then my friend pulled me aside and informed me that the kid's mom died in a car crash.
when you think about it, mud is just wet dirt. |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2002 : 11:17:15 PM
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quote:
i made fun of some kid's mom. i was astounded he was crying. then my friend pulled me aside and informed me that the kid's mom died in a car crash.
when you think about it, mud is just wet dirt.
You bastard!! Just kidding ... that really has to suck man. I experienced a similar incident in high school.
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tericee
Alien Abductee
USA
2579 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 01:25:43 AM
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I think my most embarrassing moments all occurred in college and involved alcohol. This is why I haven't been drunk in about 12 years.
teri
Did I mention that I finished a marathon? |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 01:59:59 AM
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quote:
i made fun of some kid's mom. i was astounded he was crying. then my friend pulled me aside and informed me that the kid's mom died in a car crash.
Some of the kids at my old high school used to do that. When someone said "Your mom" as a comeback, the would reply "My mom's dead". Then after he said he was sorry, they would start laughing because it wasn't true. I thought it was terrible. They did that to me once and I felt stupid, but after yelling at them I felt better.
"War is not about who is right, it is about who is left." |
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Isaac
Chatterbox
USA
461 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 10:29:30 AM
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Yeah I used to have a little drinking problem during high school, but now that I'm in college i've gotten better. ANYWAY these are probably going to sound pretty unbeleivable but I swear on my eternal soul they're all true.
1. Naked Time
My girlfriend at the time had a small party one night with some friends of hers that I didn't know very well. Well I got into this conversation with a guy where we were basically bragging about hwo much we could drink, so we started chugging wisky out of a 1.75 liter bottle. After that they managed to convince me to do a beer bong of Mountain Dew and Wisky (It wasn't mixed either they just poured wisky then dew then wisky then dew into the beer bong and it totally stayed stratified). Shortly after that I blacked out, woke up the next morning naked in my girlfriends bed. Kristy told me that I'd thrown up on myself and tried to take a shower and passed out naked on the floor of the shower, so she sent everyone home and dragged my wet naked ass upstairs. A few years later though she decided to tell me the truth. Apartently in the shower I slipped and fell, grabbed the shower curtain on my way down (bend the rod in half) and knocked myself unconcious (or passed out). Then after she heard that and came in and woke me up I started running around naked (I'm fat btw) in front of all these people I'd just met and then they left shortly after on their own.
2. Homecomming
After homecomming my senior year me and a friend took our dates back my friends brother's apartment which we had to ourselves to get good and drunk in. Well after the girls left I (again trying to impress) chugged a fifth of Voldka and instantly gagged and threw up on my shirt a little. Well I washed that off and we just sat down adn watched a movie. An hour later I grabbed his camera full of homecomming pic's and took a picture of my penis in the bathroom (thank god the place that developed it pulled the picture out). A bit after that I passed out on my friends brothers bed. Now the story I was told the next day was that my friend (Tony) walked in to find on top of the covers laying on my back, pants down pissing strait up in the air all over myself and the bed. He was freaking out because his brother was going to kill him, so he tried to pull my pants up enough so I was at least just pissing myself. In the process he got some urine on his hand, at which point he freaked out (said he almost punched me in the face right then) and ran into the bathroom to wash his hands. Aparently he came back about 3 minuets later and he said i was STILL pissing on myself haha. Anyway after I'd finished he managed to drag me out of the bed, strip the bed, strip me out of my urine soaked pajama's and get me back into my homecomming outfit. Well as soon it was looking like everything was going to be okay, and he started calming down... I started throwing up! I basically vomited on the floor in the bedroom and vomited a path all the way to the bathroom adn then I threw up in the bathroom for about 1/2 an hour before passing out. Tony was fucking pissed at this point, he spent a good hour cleaning up my vomit and getting me stripped out of my homecomming clothes and into some of his brothers clothes (which were 2 sizes too small). Then he dragged me down the stairs out into the street, threw me into my car and walked home (probably 2 miles away).
So at about 4:00 in the morning I wake up, NO IDEA what had happened, still drunk confused, I went back up to the apartment and banged on the door for like 15 minuets before I gave up. At this poitn I drove drunk across town to a friend of mines house whose parents were gone. I knew she'd be fucking her boyfriend that night but it was my only option, so I bassically rang her door bell and collapsed on the doorstep.
I woke up the next morning to the flash of camera and Mindy's little giggle. She'd planted a voldka bottle on me and was taking pictures of me in my size 32 nut huggers and her little girl tennis sweatshirt she'd put on me. I had the worst hang over ever, no idea what'd happeend last night, I didn't even know Tony well enough to remember where he lived, so after i left Mindy's I had to drive around the general area until I found it. He told me the whole story, and then we went to the apartment and gathered up all the sheets adn clothes adn shit and took them to the laundry matt and washed them.
The funniest part (in retrospect, none of this was funny at the time) was when I was putting my puke soaked boxers into the laundry machine. I was confused so I looked at the boxers I was wearing and when I looked up my eye's met Tony's and he said "Loony Toon Allstars" which of course was what the was written on the band of the boxers. HEHE thats when it really slammed home and I relized that this man has seen me naked.
3. Where am i #1
In the summer before my freshmen year I was at a friends birthday party, playing video games and drinking soda when a friend who was there suggested we all go to a real party across town. 3 of us went, we all wanted to drink so we walked. We got there and it was full of college kids who I didn't know, I paid the 3 dollar cover charge and hit the fridge only to discover all they had to drink was beer. I've never been a beer drinker but I wanted to get drunk and I'd paid so I chugged down 3 beers right away. About 20 minuets later some guys showed up with hard liquor and I was handed a 1.75 liter bottle of voldka. Now again I was out to impress these college kids with my drinking abilities so I slammed about 1/3 of that bottle. Needless to say shortly after I blacked out and woke up the next morning on my couch with my parents standing over me looking VERY pissed off. I spent the rest of the morning calling around trying to get the story on what had happened, aparently we'd left the party a few hours later, gotten a ride from some chick. We'd gotten back to the birthday party and we were hanging out playing video games again when i told everyone I wanted to get a tape from my car. They knew I was drunk as hell so they made my friend Kevin escort me. When we got out to my car I'd realized my keys were inside and the doors were locked, so Kevin ran inside to get the keys, when he came out... no Isaac.
A friend of mine a few months later told me that he'd seen me that night, walking down the center line of Main street with no shoes on (i didn't put on shoes to go out to my car) clapping my hands above my head and singing. Anyway I got about 1/2 mile away from the birthday party (I think I was trying to get back to the party) when I just walked into some house. I managed to find the bathroom in this strange dark house, but instead of urinating in the toilette I pee'd in the bathtub. I was wandering around the house when the sweet old lady who lived there came out thinking I was one of her kids comming home. Well I had a conversation with her saying all sorts of crazy shit, then she went to call the police, and I fell down her stairs into her basement and passed out.
Back at the birthday party, my friends had no choice but to wake up the kid whose house the party was at's mom and tell her what had happeend. They jumped into her car and started driving around looking for me. They found me standing in the front yard of this house COMPLETELY surrounded by cops who were all SCREAMING at me trying to find out who I was where i'd been drinking etc. When they pulled up they arrested my friend Kevin who was also drinking and they threw me in the back of the cop car and took me downtown. On the way to the cop shop I threw up ALL over the back of the cop car, and wallowed around in it the rest of the way.
I got a 90 dollar drinking ticket and I was later sent a bill for like 35 bucks from the professional cleaner they'd needed to hire to get the cop car clean.
4 Where am i #2
Okay this was during my junior year I beleive, a little over a year after my drinking ticket. I was working at a collection agency in a nearby town and this much older girl invited me and my girlfriend to go out to some parties with her and her boyfriend. Well my girlfriend couldn't make it so I wound up going out with just the 2 of them. We went to this huge house party out in the country where again I drank myself retarted with a bunch of strangers. I was actually getting so crazy they hid my booze bottle and got me high to try and mellow me out. Well it pretty much worked though I did keep asking them for my booze bottle back saying things like "please can I have that bottle, seriously I've never drank before in my life I just want to try it once" hehe. Anyway the eventually we left and went back to the girls house where she tucked me in on her couch and went into her room to shag her boyfriend.
Here's the crazy part though, I remember gonig to sleep on the couch, I couldnt' have been that drunk. But when I woke up the next morning I was NOT on that couch. I was in a bed, in a completely unknown room. I laid there for a bit, hung over and again very confused. I could hear in the other room some cartoons were on the Tv. After a while I got up and I greeted the 13ish year old boy who was watching the TV. The first words out of his mouth "who are you?", I told him my name was Isaac and I wasn't sure how i'd gotten there. He started asking me if I knew all these people, none of which I knew, then I asked him if I was still in Whitewater (the town I was in) he said yeah. Eventually I told him I was gonna go outside and see where I was, I went out the front door, stood on the sidewalk looked to my left, there was the chicks house right next door, and sure enough her front door was WIDE open. I didn't even go back in to explain to the kid I just ran in told the girl that I'd woken up at her neighbors house and had no idea what had happened, and drove my ass home.
3----------------------->
Isaac |
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 10:40:57 AM
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Isaac that is mighty impressive... to say the least. -J
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 11:04:33 AM
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Isaac, we need to go get drunk together sometime. You sound like a whole lot of fun when under the influence.
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Isaac
Chatterbox
USA
461 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 12:33:20 PM
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HAHA well if cleaning up my piss and vomit and seeing me naked sounds like fun then sure. Like I said tho, i've cooled off a lot since then. I try to stick to wine/wine coolers these days, mostly becuase I cheated on my last 2 girlfriends while under the influence and that was 2 of the worst experiences of my life.
3----------------------->
Isaac |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 12:35:47 PM
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quote:
HAHA well if cleaning up my piss and vomit and seeing me naked sounds like fun then sure. Like I said tho, i've cooled off a lot since then. I try to stick to wine/wine coolers these days, mostly becuase I cheated on my last 2 girlfriends while under the influence and that was 2 of the worst experiences of my life.
3----------------------->
Isaac
I'll be sure to cover the furniture in plastic :)
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2002 : 4:52:21 PM
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Those are some damn good stories Issac. Sounds like something one of my friends would do. He got wasted one day with one of my niehbors, and walked around the road singing and holloring. . .eventually throwing up all over the road and taking a piss in my mailbox. . .hahahahahahahahaha.
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Jay
Alien Abductee
Vatican City
2279 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2002 : 4:46:25 PM
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Yeah, those were some good ones. Mine would have to be accidently saying " And then passed my days of Fucking" Instead of " And then pased my trucking days" I was thinking about the word fuck when we were reading in my 5th grade class, and i saw that sentance and thought, " And then past my days of fucking" would sound good...and when teh teacher called on me to read, i had to read that sentance and that's how it came out...the teacher acted as if she didn't hear it...
Jay Then I got to thinking, what makes you want to go? To know the wHErefore & the Why. SO many times now, oh I can't remember, If it's September or July |
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2002 : 7:54:18 PM
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HAHAHAHA, today, in my spanish class, we were supposed to draw what we did in the morning (brush teeth, shower, etc.) But label them in Spanish. I started drawing one, and this is what happened. ME: "Mrs. Weeks (my very hot teacher) I have a question." TEACHER: "Yes Pedro." ME: "Is it all right if I draw my bed in this picture with a woman lieing in it? Ya know, after a pasionate love making session." EVERYONE LAUGHS. TEACHER: "Oh Pedro. . . remember, your supposed to be drawing what you do AFTER you wake up from your sad, pathetic dreams." I layed my head down in shame. . .for I had been TOLD.
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2002 : 8:29:23 PM
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OUCH, that's frekin' hilarious. I think I had that same teacher (the hot one) when I was in high school. She was always cool like that. Remind me to tell you about the video we did for our English class sometime...not an embarassing moment, but funny, nonetheless.
-Jason-
I am a servant of the power behind the nothing. |
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2002 : 10:12:12 PM
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enthuTIMsiast, yes, it was hilarious. It's always cool having one of those teachers thats young (she's 25,26, I think) She's always messing aruond and letting dirty jokes and cuss words slide at times. Hey,enthuTIMsiast, share that story, whenevery you get the chance.
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/16/2002 : 12:42:13 AM
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Well...this didn't happen to me, but I was there. Most of my classmates and I were coming back from a field trip on a bus and two of my friends (a hispanic and a filipino) were making fun of each other's race. You know like "do you sell oranges?". All of us were having a good laugh becuase no one was serious. Then the Hispanic says "Do you eat dog?". Then the filipino replied "If your mom counts then yeah!" I was cracking up.
"War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left." "Why would you even shake a man's hand if you're not going to help him stand." |
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Saint Jude
Alien Abductee
USA
2144 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2002 : 03:11:27 AM
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I dont know if this counts as embarasing but at a show my band did i decided to wear some short shorts and a sports bra. It was very funny, not too embarassing though, cuz i did it myself, if someone were to rip off my pants and shirt to discover that that is what i was wearing underneth, then that would be embarasing.
Patriotism is a maggot in their heads. - Henry D. Thoreau |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2002 : 04:15:47 AM
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And even more funny!!!!
"War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left." "Why would you even shake a man's hand if you're not going to help him stand." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2002 : 06:45:19 AM
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Isaac Said:quote: Pot robs you of your ambition where alcohol does not.
You should have never posted this comment and those stories anywhere NEAR each other. How can you type those stories and really honestly believe this statement. I think you have proved my argument against this statement for me. Thanx for the help.
Peace & Keep the Faith Fluffy |
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 01/19/2002 : 7:19:26 PM
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HAHAHAHA, just rememberd. One night, at Battle of the Bands (which was also teamed up with the school talent show due to the low number of bands) me, my brother, and my friend Phillip sat down and watched the comediac acts, dancing, and great band performing. One person gets out there, dressed in a karate uniform. The lights dim red, and everything is quiet. The boy stands still, arms locked together, looking up at the ceiling. Phillip all of a sudden yells, "Mortal Kombat!" OH MY GOD. That had to be the funniest things in the world. People around us burst out laughing, and I was to the point of tears. That wasnt embarssing for anyone really, just thought i'd be fun to post it.
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victorwootenfan
Alien Abductee
USA
2128 Posts |
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