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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
 Posted - 05/12/2005 : 4:57:02 PM
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Has anyone ever been so frusterated with University politics--(favored majors, lack of funding, terrible service) that they just snapped and wanted to get back at them? Well, one such year at my college I did just that. It was a few years back, and I was beyond angry with the school's administration...so one night I devised a plan, in which I would coat the inside of a main elevator with several tupperware containers full of my very own excrement. It was a success. Their were detectives there, tons of angry faculty...the deed was a success.
Has anyone ever been so angry it has driven them to do something like this? |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Hopeful Rolling Waves
Alien Abductee
South Sandwich Islands
2154 Posts |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/12/2005 : 8:54:04 PM
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| oh. man. welcome aboard. that deserves a round of applause. let's have a show of hands. who's laughing themseleves stupid. i know i am. |
death to false metal. |
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Arthen
Alien Abductee
USA
4845 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 12:38:20 AM
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wow.
Holy shit. Literally.
"Speak, friend, and enter!" |
Steve Hackett: "I'm my own opening act, you see."
Tim (before "Faceoff"): "Peace, love....and SEX!"
cbenc41@hotmail.com |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 03:21:53 AM
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Yeah....my college is like that (favoritism and service, not the poop thing). The business school gets new computers every 2 years and I'm pretty sure that the mechanical engineering lab has had the same computers for several years (they don't even have windows XP). And at any given time there are at least 4 computers down. I mean, they could at least give us the business school's old computers. But no, they want to keep the stupid business majors happy because it's the moneymaker for the school. I mean, even the philosophy and theology departments have better facilities than we did. And I can guarantee that they didn't use them as often as we did. What did they have to do? Write a couple of papers a semester? Try writing a 30 page lab report every week for a year and a half.
Oh well. I graduated. I won't be using any of that stuff anymore, which means that they will probably upgrade everything now. |
Gay marriage killed the dinosaurs. |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 11:17:22 AM
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| yeah. try being a music major. at least where i go. |
death to false metal. |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 11:21:08 AM
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Yes, it's like getting the shit end of the stick...This way I feel I was literally giving it back to them.
Man, you should have seen the cleaning staff the next day. They were cursing, saying they had never seen such disgusting inconsiderateness in their lives.
For weeks, their was this thing circulating ammount the design arts staff and students--calling the person who did it "The mad shitter"
I actually struck again once--mad shitter strikes again. A teacher asked me if I knew who the mad shitter was, I couldn't help laugh and say I didn't know what he was talking about. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Arthen
Alien Abductee
USA
4845 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 3:16:23 PM
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| You know, technically speaking, you never crapped in the elevator. You just took it with you. I think that's the funniest/sickest part of the story. Is that you collected it in tupperware probably for a good week and a half. Hopefully you threw the tupperware out after that or gave it to an ex-girlfriend or something. |
Steve Hackett: "I'm my own opening act, you see."
Tim (before "Faceoff"): "Peace, love....and SEX!"
cbenc41@hotmail.com |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 4:12:04 PM
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Yes, actually, I was storing it up for weeks in my dorm...I would poop in the containers, then make sure it was sealed air-tight. To make it smell worse, I would occasionally add beer. It was the foulest smelling poop you could imagine. I basically filled up 3 medium-sized tupperware containers with it.
The way I put it in was pretty spy-agent type...I snuck it past the security guards in a black briefcase, then for some reason, the keys that were issued to students in my department for entry into or studios happened to be able to work with this lockdown feature in the elevators...you know what I'm talking about...sometimes you see elevators have that keyhole near the buttons you press to get from floor to floor? Well anyway, I got into the elevator and pushed 5 to start gettign the thing moving. Then, I put my key in the lock and turned it--this caused the elevator to come to a halt--no up and down movement, doors are now inopperable. I figured this out before--one turn of the key would stop the elevator dead in it's tracks, one more key would resume it. I made sure that I could stop and start the elevator this way. It would be devestating if I was stuck in an elevator full of my own shit on account of the key thing not working.
But praise the lord, it did work. I stopped the elevator. between 2 floors, so there was no chance of anyone being able to get on or off of it. I then unpacked my briefcase and opened the first tupperware container...holy mother of god, the stench went right to my nose--the whole place instantly smelled like you had your nose shoved up someone's colon.
I burried my face in a teashirt with one hand to fend off the stench. I knew I had about 5 minutes to do something before security would start wondering why the elevator wasn't working. So there I went--took a large paint brush and proceeded to coat the walls with my shit. Then, I started to get used to the smell for some horrible sick reason, and let go of the teeshirt and used both hands to work faster. I then proceeded to remove the lighting panels from the ceiling in order to coat the underside of the top of the elevator car. I'm lucky none of it fell into my hair, because I was smearing it around like crazy...it was so gooey and nasty I could have written my name with it.
The last and most nasty thing I did, in my opinion after I replaced the lighting panels, was to take one more tupperware container full of it and start to shove it into the telephone hole and other holes in the wood frames. Imagine grabbing for a telephone only to have poop come between your fingers. So I shoved it in far--so far if was falling behind the frame itself--a place that the maintenance crew would actually have to unscrew and remove in order to clean it out.
So long story short, the elevator was completely saturated with my modified ass-fodder. I turned the key, pushed the roof floor (which you can only get to with a key), and then escaped down the fire-stair (which there was no alarm for).
It was one of the happiest days of my life when I saw how angry they all got--the very people who had been screwing me over for years. I had pooped on the school...and for months, no matter how much they cleaned, you could still smell some poop in the elevator.
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love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 05/13/2005 : 7:30:51 PM
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You school sounds very good....
FOR ME TO POOP ON! |
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tericee
Alien Abductee
USA
2579 Posts |
Posted - 05/16/2005 : 11:25:41 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by pcbTIM
Yeah....my college is like that (favoritism and service, not the poop thing). The business school gets new computers every 2 years and I'm pretty sure that the mechanical engineering lab has had the same computers for several years (they don't even have windows XP). And at any given time there are at least 4 computers down. I mean, they could at least give us the business school's old computers. But no, they want to keep the stupid business majors happy because it's the moneymaker for the school. I mean, even the philosophy and theology departments have better facilities than we did. And I can guarantee that they didn't use them as often as we did. What did they have to do? Write a couple of papers a semester? Try writing a 30 page lab report every week for a year and a half.
Should have gone to MIT... Nuff said. |
teri 
Twittering about the DC adventure since Dec '09...
(Micro)Blog * Photo Album
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guitarisPIMP
Yak Addict
Niue
587 Posts |
Posted - 05/16/2005 : 1:58:38 PM
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goddamn...
i'm speechless.
this thread is too funny for words, you just made my week. |
my favorite color is go fuck yourself. :D |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/19/2005 : 2:25:20 PM
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| Anyone ever pee out their window @ college? |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Jiyra
Chatterbox
124 Posts |
Posted - 05/19/2005 : 2:31:52 PM
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| absolutely, and at a girls college, and out a car while it was moving, and when I was in New York I thought about sneaking a piss off the empire state building; it'd get a nice arc I bet. |
silly girl, sanity is for boys |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/19/2005 : 2:50:23 PM
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| you did it at a girl's college? Did you manage to have it go down the walls so that it washed over the windows of the person below you? The empire state building would be great...and even better if someone you didn't like was standing below |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Arthen
Alien Abductee
USA
4845 Posts |
Posted - 05/19/2005 : 5:03:22 PM
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| I didn't know R. Kelly posted on this board. |
Steve Hackett: "I'm my own opening act, you see."
Tim (before "Faceoff"): "Peace, love....and SEX!"
cbenc41@hotmail.com |
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guitarisPIMP
Yak Addict
Niue
587 Posts |
Posted - 05/19/2005 : 5:36:47 PM
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My friend peed off of a balcony in a mall once. He has the ability to stop peeing on command (people tell me that they can't do this, even though i thought it was a normal ability..go figure). Anyways, so there was this bitch at a table we didn't like, so to make a long-story short we convinced the most daring kid in our group to pee on her, and he did it, for 10 bucks. He whipped out his purple-headed cannon, let loose for a few seconds, ceased fire, and we all scraaaamed. We never got caught nor did we look back to see what havoc was wreaked. Surprisingly, no one who saw it made a big deal about it, i guessonly a couple people saw it. Nevertheless, my friend deserves an award.
By the way, did this thread make anyone else have to go take a dump after reading it, or is it just me? |
my favorite color is go fuck yourself. :D |
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BurbonSong
Try A Little Harder
USA
61 Posts |
Posted - 05/20/2005 : 03:27:45 AM
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wow, this is some crazy shit...
not sure if I should laugh or run away |
"Here's a song called Feeling Doors...I have no clue what it means because my daughter named it...I guess it means she's cooler than I am"
AIM: BurbonSong
haikuwarrior@gmail.com
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Arthen
Alien Abductee
USA
4845 Posts |
Posted - 05/20/2005 : 03:52:36 AM
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| "Take me to your special place, close your eyes show me your face, I'm gonna piss on it." |
Steve Hackett: "I'm my own opening act, you see."
Tim (before "Faceoff"): "Peace, love....and SEX!"
cbenc41@hotmail.com |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/20/2005 : 1:00:00 PM
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I have to say, I have been pooping quite a bit more since this thread came into being. What is it about reading about poop that does that? I don't know.
Anyway, I think that peeing story is nearly as perfect as it can get for random disgusting thrills. Just imagine, some hard-ass bitch is enjoying her saladworks and her latte, and all of a sudden she gets hit in the face with a stream of urine--out of nowhere. Wow I would have loved to see that, and see what she said to the people around her, or when she got back to the office. "Yes, some random person peed on my head and face--I don't know who it is, sorry about the smell." |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Jiyra
Chatterbox
124 Posts |
Posted - 05/20/2005 : 9:23:28 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Kazi
I have to say, I have been pooping quite a bit more since this thread came into being. What is it about reading about poop that does that? I don't know.
maybe it's infectious like yawning...or crabs.
and Arthen, you should've waited to use that R. Kelly gem on guitarispimp. |
silly girl, sanity is for boys |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/23/2005 : 1:06:43 PM
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| It's all about the pooping. And peeing of course. could you imagine a stream of yellow urine running down your window in the middle of the day--just some random stream. If music was playing in the background during this historical event, I wonder what it would be.. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/23/2005 : 5:19:54 PM
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| i was in the patriots riot in boston with a friend mine a while back. he got pissed on. it was awesome. |
death to false metal. |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/24/2005 : 12:33:45 PM
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| wow how did he get peed on? Did someone just unzip themselves and let the wang go to town, or did a girl straddle his neck and wet herself with it running down his back? |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 05/24/2005 : 10:05:29 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Kazi
wow how did he get peed on? Did someone just unzip themselves and let the wang go to town, or did a girl straddle his neck and wet herself with it running down his back?
Somehow that statement bothered me more than the whole painting feces in the inside of an elavator thing. |
Gay marriage killed the dinosaurs. |
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Kenneth
Chatterbox
218 Posts |
Posted - 05/25/2005 : 10:34:07 AM
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I agree.
Pee fetish comes to mind. And of course, feces. Ah yes, can't leave out the anal excrement in this thread. |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/25/2005 : 11:51:34 AM
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shut up, don't say things like that. the makers of soul calibur might be reading this. a lot of those moves are questionable enough as it is.
as i remember it, some dude just let loose from a window. we were going to go up, but they were shooting bottle rockets from window to window. so, you know, rather than getting blasted, we just stayed outside. |
death to false metal. |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/25/2005 : 3:46:26 PM
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amazing, the boston post declares:
"random urination hits person in face"
Yes, I think Seung Mina could use a pee-on-back-of neck throw-based move.
Sophitia would probably pee standing up.
for another throw move, I think Edgemaster should be able to morph into a defacated elevator which traps your opponent for 2 seconds and causes massive damage. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/25/2005 : 5:53:58 PM
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| god help you if either one of them does anything like that. i refuse to fight sophitia because of her current, uh, throw moves as it is. the "heaven's arch" move makes me more uncomfortable than a bed of fucking nails. it's not a moral objection, but they're obviously playing to pervs. that and someone had to concieve of and program all that. that and the other move, which i don't know what it's called. |
death to false metal. |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 05/27/2005 : 11:59:04 AM
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this is straight-up racist, but I have heard that Japan is one of the most perverted countries in the world--public vending machines where you can buy teen-girl's soiled panties, hotels that rent rooms by the hour, porn being sold openly on street corners. It makes sense they would want to inject some of their perv tendencies into videogames. I bet some of the programers there have straight-up porn versions of the same games sold worldwide...
Let's imagine: in the uncut version, Cervantes would be able to shove his swords up other's orifices--both of them for a double penetration move. Taki would be able to wrap her vagina around an opponent's head and squeeze it off. Ivy would have a genital mutilation move with that crazy sword/whip she has. Sophita would probably just pee on you standing up. I'm sure Raphael would get hard--all one inch of him and start thrusting away violently in your ear, while asteroth would take his enormous phlacid cock and smack you accross the face with it, so powerfully that it would knock you out of the ring. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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Kenneth
Chatterbox
218 Posts |
Posted - 05/27/2005 : 2:41:26 PM
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You guys are a lot more knowledgeble of these games than I am but I like that move you mentioned Kazi.
"Taki would be able to wrap her vagina around an opponent's head and squeeze it off."
Sweet! Now that would be something to see. Maybe an even a better move would be to wrap her vagina around his head, bend back and wrap her mouth around his cock head and squeeze both off at the same time. That would definitely leave a mark. That would be one hell of a finishing move.
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/27/2005 : 3:25:37 PM
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| this thread is now terrifying. |
death to false metal. |
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Jiyra
Chatterbox
124 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2005 : 11:32:54 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Kazi
this is straight-up racist, but I have heard that Japan is one of the most perverted countries in the world--public vending machines where you can buy teen-girl's soiled panties, hotels that rent rooms by the hour, porn being sold openly on street corners.
I don't know about anywhere else, but two of those three things are extremely commonplace where I live, and I only wish I could say it was Canada. |
silly girl, sanity is for boys |
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therippa
Fluffy-Esque
Kazakhstan
1099 Posts |
Posted - 06/02/2005 : 1:15:56 PM
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I saw this and it reminded me of this thread...
http://msnbc.msn.com/id/7912464 |
Aspiring to Be Fluffy-Esque an Alien Abductee! |
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chrism
Is Anybody Here?
Canada
45 Posts |
Posted - 06/02/2005 : 3:05:32 PM
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| trucker bombs? first time i've heard that term. but when you've gotta go you've gotta go, that isn't "lazy", it's just disgusting. |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 06/03/2005 : 4:32:34 PM
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Great article...I wondered about them. I bet they also jerk off alot on long trips--I sure know I do. I wonder if they shoot their semen into them. Mmmm semen and urine. But what do the women do? Do they wear diapers? Perhaps plastic bags around the area would do the trick.
That would explain the bags out the window. Excellent. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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guitarisPIMP
Yak Addict
Niue
587 Posts |
Posted - 06/03/2005 : 8:07:58 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Kazi
Great article...I wondered about them. I bet they also jerk off alot on long trips--I sure know I do. I wonder if they shoot their semen into them. Mmmm semen and urine. But what do the women do? Do they wear diapers? Perhaps plastic bags around the area would do the trick.
That would explain the bags out the window. Excellent.
Women use a complex system of tubing, all materials accessible through your local Kendall's Hardware or Home Depot. The unwanted excretions are deposited in their recepticals, and in more advanced trucks, there is an eject button that launches the used receptical in any desired direction. These are known as trucker catapults.  |
my favorite color is go fuck yourself. :D |
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Kazi
Is Anybody Here?
46 Posts |
Posted - 06/06/2005 : 5:44:09 PM
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| that would be a nasty prank to replace a store's lemonade with trucker bombs. |
love is not who you want to go to bed with, it's who you want to wake up with. |
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So mad I pooped in the elevator
