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GuitarGuy305
Alien Abductee
USA
2007 Posts |
 Posted - 04/11/2002 : 12:28:48 AM
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Brings back memories.
Adam
There's a lot more to music than notes on a page.
I am Ion, the priest of the inner sanctuary. I submit myself to an unendurable torment. I dismembered myself, and I have become spirit.
Email: Guitar_Boy1@yahoo.com
AIM: GuitarGuy305 |
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 12:31:05 AM
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It's BONER time!
-J
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 12:56:07 AM
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Is that soda in the bottle?
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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My_Bad_Side
Alien Abductee
2000 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 01:36:25 AM
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Nope, it's grease. The kid needs industrial stuff.
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 06:30:44 AM
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Silkys responce reminds me of a joke:
This couple was riding in there car, the man driving, the woman next to him. The woman knew that her boy friend was cheating on her, so she was waiting for a chance to bring up it. With all her thinking, she lost control, cut his dick off, and threw it out the window. It bounces of this trucks window, where the little girl inside screams. Little Girl: Daddy, what was that!
Trying to come up with something good: Dad: A bug dear, just a bug.
Little Girl: That bug had a really big dick!
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 11:21:48 AM
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Hahaha... I've heard that one before... it's great. Here's another:
A man goes to the doctor with a piece of lettuce dangling from his rectum.
"That look's nasty," says the doctor.
"Nasty?" the man says, "That's just the tip of the iceburg."
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LizT
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1687 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 11:49:18 AM
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Gee Silky, I don't think I want a salad anytime soon! LOL!
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 3:44:18 PM
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Speaking of salad. . . what the hell's up with Ranch Dressing. Is that not the nastiest stuff in the world???
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 4:04:59 PM
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quote:
Speaking of salad. . . what the hell's up with Ranch Dressing. Is that not the nastiest stuff in the world???
Did you just say that? You're cruisin' for a mushroom bruisin'.
-J
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KevinLesko
Alien Abductee
3712 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 4:14:13 PM
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damn, I never had it so lucky, I always read friggin doctor suess. Grrrrrrrr
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 9:28:25 PM
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eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!! Ranch dressing!!! I think I'm gonna throw up now.
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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KevinLesko
Alien Abductee
3712 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 10:50:30 PM
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ranch dressing eh????????????
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GuitarGuy305
Alien Abductee
USA
2007 Posts |
Posted - 04/11/2002 : 11:32:57 PM
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I like ranch dressing...i really like Italian, though today there are about 3000 varietys of Italian dressing, Spicy, Robusto, Emerils kicked up italian....
Adam
Music is more than notes on a page
I'm trying to spell what only the wind can explain
Email: Guitar_Boy1@yahoo.com
AIM: GuitarGuy305 |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 06:04:18 AM
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Somebody get a mop!
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 10:04:48 AM
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Thousand Island is the way to go, ^_^
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My_Bad_Side
Alien Abductee
2000 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 12:24:30 PM
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French.
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victorwootenfan
Alien Abductee
USA
2128 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 1:07:37 PM
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Ranch flavored chips, of the dorito persuasion...yum
but i would have to say french for salad
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 5:15:22 PM
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Those silly French with their salads and their dressings.....
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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My_Bad_Side
Alien Abductee
2000 Posts |
Posted - 04/12/2002 : 6:17:46 PM
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You English pig-dog.
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:02:44 AM
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A=Arthur D=Dennis W=Woman
A: Old woman?
D: Man!
A: Man…..sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?
D: I’m 37.
A: What?
D: I’m 37. I’m not old.
A: Well I can’t just call you man.
D: Well you could say Dennis.
A: I didn’t know you were called Dennis.
D: Well you didn’t bother to find out, did you?
A: I did say sorry about the “old woman”, but from behind you looked……
D: What I object to is you automatically treating me like an inferior.
A: Well I am king.
D: Oh king, eh? Very nice! And how did you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to our dative imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society. If there’s ever going to be any progress….
W: Dennis! There’s some lovely filth down here! Ooh! How’d you do?
A: How’d you do, good lady. I am Arthur, king of the Britons. Whose castle is that?
W: King of the who?
A: The Britons.
W: Who are the Britons?
A: Well we all are. We are all Britons. And I am your king.
W: I didn’t know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective.
D: You’re fooling yourself. We’re living in a dictatorship. A self-perpetuating autocracy in which the working classes……
W: Oh there you go. Bringing class into it again.
D: Well that’s what it’s all about! If only people would….
A: Please!! Please, good people. I am in haste. Who lives in that castle?
W: No one lives there.
A: Then who is your lord?
W: We don’t have a lord.
A: What?
D: I told you. We’re an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week.
A: Yes.
D: But all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting…
A: Yes I see.
D: …by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs…..
A: Be quiet!
D: …but by 2/3 majority in the case of more….
A: Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!
W: Order, eh? Who does he think he is?
A: I am your king!
W: Well I didn’t vote for you.
A: You don’t vote for kings.
W: Well, how did you become king then?
A: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering saymite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water. Signifying by divine providence, that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king!
D: Listen! Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses. Not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
A: Be quiet!
D: You can't expect to wield supreme executive power, just cuz some watery tart threw a sword at you!
A: Shut up!
D: I mean. If I went around, saying I was an emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me.....they'd put me away!
A: Shut up! Will you shut up!!
D: Oh! Now we see the violence inherent in the system!
A: Shut up!
D: Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!!
A: Bloody peasant!
D: Oh! What a giveaway! Did you here that? Did you here that, eh? That's what I'm on about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw it, didn't you?
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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chatterballs
Chatterbox
117 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:15:13 AM
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Hey pcdmb, you know we're the only two on the board right now...actually I think Fluffy is lurking...
Help, help, I'm being repressed!
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I once saw a movie where this bus had to keep its SPEED above 50 and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode...I think it was called, the bus that couldn't slow down. |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:22:03 AM
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Since you said that.......
Smoke-too-much: Well yes, I've been on package tours many times and so your advert really bought my eye.
Bounder: Ah good.
Smoke-too-much: Yes, you're quite right. I'm fed up with being treated like sheep. I mean what's the point of going abroad if you're just another tourist carted around in buses surrounded by sweaty mindless oafs from Kettering and Boventry in their cloth caps and their cardigans and their transistor radios and their Sunday Mirrors, complaining about the tea - 'Oh they don't make it properly here, do they, not like at home' - and stopping at Majorcan bodegas selling fish and chips and Watney's Red Barrel and calamaries and two veg and sitting in their cotton sun frocks squirting Timothy White's suncream all over their puffy raw swollen purulent flesh 'cos they 'overdid it on the first day.'
And being herded into endless Hotel Miramars and Bellvueses and Bontinentales with their modern international luxury roomettes and draught Red Barrel and swimming pools full of fat German businessmen pretending they're acrobats forming pyramids and frightening the children and barging into queues and if you're not at your table spot on seven you miss the bowl of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, the first item on the menu of International Cuisine, and every Thursday night the hotel has a bloody cabaret in the bar, featuring a tiny emaciated dago with nine-inch hips and some bloated fat tart with her hair brylcreemed down and a big arse presenting Flamenco for Foreigners.
And then an adenoidal typists from Birmingham with flabby white legs and diarrhea trying to pick up hairy bandy-legged wop waiters called Manuel and once a week there's an excursion to the local Roman Ruins to buy cherryade and melted ice cream and bleeding Watney's Red Barrel and one evening you visit the so called typical restaurant with local colour and atmosphere and you sit next to a party from Rhyl who keep singing 'Torremolinos, torremolinos' and complaining about the food - 'It's so greasy here, isn't it?' - and you get cornered by some drunken greengrocer from Luton with an Instamatic camera and Dr. Scholl sandals and last Tuesday's Daily Express and he drones on and on and on about how Mr. Smith should be running this country and how many languages Enoch Powell can speak and then he throws up over the Cuba Libres.
And sending tinted postcards of places they don't realize they haven't even visited to 'All at number 22, weather wonderful, our room is marked with an 'X'. Food very greasy but we've found a charming little local place hidden away in the back streets where they serve Watney's Red Barrel and cheese and onion crisps and the accordionist plays 'Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner'.
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:24:19 AM
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Lurking and smirking!!!
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy          |
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chatterballs
Chatterbox
117 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:25:44 AM
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Turkish: Did you understand a word of what he just said?
Me: Zuh?!
Must be a British thing.
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I once saw a movie where this bus had to keep its SPEED above 50 and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode...I think it was called, the bus that couldn't slow down. |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 04/13/2002 : 04:43:37 AM
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I have that last one half-memorized.......and the one before that is completely memorized.
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Ah, Childhood....
