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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
 Posted - 01/24/2002 : 11:25:10 AM
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Well, it's not really a mystery, and this really applies toward men. Well, maybe some woment may feel my pain as well.
The other night, while getting changed in front of my wife, she was checking out my ass. She noticed, ever so eliquently, that I have a dent in my right cheek in the shape of my wallet.
Now, I never noticed it before, but now it's bothering the shit outta me. Because she's right, even if I don't have my wallet in my pocket all day, the dent is still there.
Anyone else who carries a wallet in their back pocket have this issue? Or is it just me? Now, keep in mind, I'm a fucking twig... I'm 6' tall and I weight 170lbs. And, to top it all off, I wear baggy clothes. I dunno, my ass must have just deflated in one spot to compensate for sitting on my wallet all the time.
But, when you really think about it, it's quite hilarious.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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LizT
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1687 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 11:41:12 AM
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Hey Dave, maybe you should try Buns of Steele! LOL! See what happens when you get old, it just gets worse my friend...
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 11:43:52 AM
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I hope its just because you have PHAT wallet. "INFINITE MONEY" Ahhhh, the dream lives!
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy          |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 11:46:42 AM
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Yeah .. I wish fluffy. My wallet is thin as hell. Just my license, a few credit cards and ATM card and that's it. That's why it bothers me, it isn't like a have a thick wallet.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:06:55 PM
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It's better than carrying a purse my friend!! Better than carrying a purse!!!
I have a HEMP wallet, guess what color it is?
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:12:34 PM
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I'm gonna have to go with Purple on this one. Yeah, purple.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:24:54 PM
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DING DING DING(bells and whistles going off) You got it!! How did you guess? And when you open it, its green on the inside, my other favorite color. Oh yeah, it also has an embroidered black and white Ying and Yang on it. It is WAY KEWL, Tres chic!!!
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:38:20 PM
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Like I said in another post, we were seperated at birth. Either that, or I'm just that damn good.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:45:45 PM
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You know this whole ass dents thing has got me a little worried about my own ass. I was always happy with the little dimples but I sure hope my wallet isn't destroying my cute ass. I'll see if I can get the next person(read: girl)who sees me naked, who doesn't run off shrieking in terror to have a look at my ass. Hopefully you will still be "ALIVE" when that happens. Cause it just may be awhile. I will be sure to post the clinical results. Does anyone know if there is a place you can go to have your ass checked for dents? Some kind of clinic or whatnot. I would prefer a professional opinion. Not one of those fly-by-night, found-em-on-the-street, ass-dent quacks, who don't know what the hell they are looking at or talking about when it comes to the health and welfare of my ass. It's a scary world out there, and I don't want to leave my ass in just anyones hands. Who knows where they have been.
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 12:54:54 PM
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Email a picture of your ass to Black Lotus's wife. She seems to be the expert on ass dents.
My ass dent is so deep that you can scan my credit card number right off my ass.
-Jason-
I am a servant of the power behind the nothing. |
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LizT
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1687 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:01:16 PM
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Humm, I think there is a resident nurse on the message board... She has seen many asses in her days, nightmares I tell you!!
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:02:31 PM
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LMAO!! My wife is an expert of how my ass should look. Fluffy will have to seek help in a dark alley somewhere. I'm sure if he went to the 9:30 club (if it's still in DC), he could find pleanty of assistance there.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:04:32 PM
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LOL, Now thats FUNNY!! SAD, but very FUNNY!! Sorry to laugh as you wallow in your misery. I am sure my day will be coming. Then I will have to turn the other CHEEK(HEHE) and face the cold hard fact that I have an ASS-DENT!! I will be so ashamed, I will never be able to show my ass in public again. For they will look and laugh and point(like they don't already). The shame will be so great I will turn to
CRACK(HEHE)in my hour of misery. And I will wither away a lonely bitter old ASSHOLE(HEHE). And as they put me in the ground, they will carve on my head stone(which will have a CRACK in it) Here Lies A Man Who Had A BIG ASS dent!!
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:21:18 PM
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Hey! That headstone will require another donation my friend.
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"Submit to the present evil, lest the greater one befall you." |
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Saint Jude
Alien Abductee
USA
2144 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:22:15 PM
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quote:
I'm a fucking twig... I'm 6' tall and I weight 170lbs.
Heh u think your skiny, im 6 ft tall, and weight in at a trim 140lbs. i could be a stand in for those starving ethiopein kids. Its actually quite disturbing to me that i can not gain weight. . . o well.
- Cresentfresh. |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:24:19 PM
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Ok, updated my signature to a more fitting one ;)
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Stonimal rights activist with a dented ass. |
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Saint Jude
Alien Abductee
USA
2144 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 1:50:01 PM
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heh, there u go.
- Cresentfresh. |
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LizT
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1687 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 3:26:22 PM
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Hey Saint Jude, I'm in the same boat as you! I'm a lean tall gal..
5'8" and 120 pounds. It's difficult to find clothes to fit, the legs on pants usually aren't long enough!
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 3:28:46 PM
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I will refrain from being a pig and not say, "You can wear me" aloud, nor will I type it in this topic.
Uh... yeah.
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Stonimal rights activist with a dented ass. |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 3:57:44 PM
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quote:
Heh u think your skiny, im 6 ft tall, and weight in at a trim 140lbs.
That's me to a T...or should I say a P.
"You tried your best and you failed miserably...the lesson is: Never Try." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 4:02:47 PM
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Or we could just call you TP, you know another abbreviation.
TP = Toilet Paper
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 4:05:50 PM
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And there's also PT....paper towels
"You tried your best and you failed miserably...the lesson is: Never Try." |
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 8:20:30 PM
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and PTP...prime time playa
-Jason-
I am a servant of the power behind the nothing. |
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Saint Jude
Alien Abductee
USA
2144 Posts |
Posted - 01/24/2002 : 10:05:14 PM
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TP = Titty Pink
Mills Lane (sp?) said that on Conan describing his car or something, but it was freaking hilarious.
- Cresentfresh. |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/25/2002 : 12:20:42 AM
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How about: TPPTPw/PT+TPpcbdmb
Thats:
Titty Pink Prime Time Playa with Paper Towels and Toilet Paper pcbdmb
although, I think it is getting a little long to be called an abbreviation anymore.
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/25/2002 : 12:29:54 AM
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Black Lotus Said:quote:
Hey! That headstone will require another donation my friend.
(In my best Bevis voice, and I do a wikked Bevis impersonation)
Are you threating me? I need TP for my bunghole!!
(or is that TPPTPw/PT+TP for my bunghole, its all so confusing, my head is spinning and I think my ass may have a dent in it. I must be in sad shape or at least a bad state of disrepair. My ass seems to be dented and cracked. First I had a crack and now I have a dent. Looks like it is time for some major body work. I wonder if I can fix it with bondo?)
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/25/2002 : 12:43:28 AM
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quote:
How about: TPPTPw/PT+TPpcbdmb
Wow! Try saying that three times fast! You'll get tongue-tied.......one more ways that one!!!
"You tried your best and you failed miserably...the lesson is: Never Try." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/25/2002 : 12:50:19 AM
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three times fast = TTF
TPPTPw/PT+TPpcbdmb
TPPTPw/PT+TPpcbdmb
TPPTPw/PT+TPpcbdmb
that wasn't so bad, I didn't get tongue-tied = TT
althought my fingers got a little "tangled up in blue"
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/25/2002 : 12:52:37 AM
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quote:
althought my fingers got a little "tangled up in blue"
BULLSHIT! I saw you Copy and Paste!! Mom! Fluffy's cheating again!!
"You tried your best and you failed miserably...the lesson is: Never Try." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2002 : 4:32:27 PM
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Curses, I have been found out!! Still have you tried to reach for that "control" key and the "v" key, it can quite a stretch! Try to do it TTF while hitting the "enter" key for next line and you get a little TT(or tangled up in blue)
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2002 : 12:15:10 PM
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Have you ever thought...if TR was a typist, I'll bet he can type about 300 words a minute. Cause his fingers sure are fast, and he can obviously think very fast to match them, so he could probably type like lightning if he took the notion.
-Jason-
I am a servant of the power behind the nothing. |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2002 : 5:04:34 PM
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If that was the case, then I'd fax him rough copies of papers that I had to write!
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 12:37:47 AM
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TR is actually a slow typist, hunt and peck style. SLOOOOOOOOW!!!
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 03:42:09 AM
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Well, that's what I figured. You've said he's not particularly computer saavy, so I figured that meant that he couldn't type all that well, among other thigns. What I meant was that if he had applied his life in that direction, think how fast he could type. I mean, it utilizes bascially the same skills. Coordination, quickness, etc...
-Jason-
I am a servant of the power behind the nothing. |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 03:52:55 AM
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EnthuTIMsiast Said:quote:
Coordination, quickness, etc...
Alcohol tends to affect these as well along with causing people to ramble on and on incoherently.
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 04:57:08 AM
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JASON, LAY OFF THE SoCo!!!
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 09:10:28 AM
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Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm ... beer.
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500 Club |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 7:42:26 PM
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quote:
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm ... beer.
LOL!! I have that poster of Homer having a thought bubble of a beer and underneath it says "Got Beer?"
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2002 : 11:56:31 PM
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AHAHAHHAHAHHAA!! I have to get that poster.
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Trade my life for a barrel of gold.
Find someone else before I get too old.
If I live my life for aesthetic gain,
will you repay me with all your pain? |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2002 : 01:38:45 AM
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Well you ain't getting it from me!!!
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2002 : 09:59:38 AM
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Yeah ... I don't think a trip to the UK would be justified with one poster. I'd have to take a lot of other stuff too, what else you got?
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Trade my life for a barrel of gold.
Find someone else before I get too old.
If I live my life for aesthetic gain,
will you repay me with all your pain? |
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pcbTIM
Alien Abductee
USA
6501 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2002 : 6:08:43 PM
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You could make it a tax write-off. BUt if you don't want that......hmmmmmmmm...I've got a barely used thong.......and I would have a purple evening gown, but jsoldo won't give it back! At this rate, i won't want it back because I fear what he might have to do it or in it.
"I do what I can with what I've got." |
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Black Lotus
Fluffy-Esque
Burkina Faso (Upper Volta)
1043 Posts |
Posted - 01/31/2002 : 9:18:51 PM
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pcb, you may want to ask fluffly about the dress and what's been done in it.
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Trade my life for a barrel of gold.
Find someone else before I get too old.
If I live my life for aesthetic gain,
will you repay me with all your pain? |
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drummerboy82
Chatterbox
USA
118 Posts |
Posted - 02/01/2002 : 10:07:41 AM
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quote:
quote:
I'm a fucking twig... I'm 6' tall and I weight 170lbs.
Heh u think your skiny, im 6 ft tall, and weight in at a trim 140lbs. i could be a stand in for those starving ethiopein kids. Its actually quite disturbing to me that i can not gain weight. . . o well.
- Cresentfresh.
140 lbs of flying furry!!
Temporaryism has been the black plague, and Jesus of our age -Incubus |
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Ass dents, the mystery.
