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 epic cockblock.

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dan p. Posted - 04/08/2009 : 8:55:03 PM
i've wanted to tell this story all day. quick background info. i live in a dorm, in a single. the guy next to me plays computer games constantly. except, he always fucking yells. he gets really angry and yells in outrage at the machine and the people he's playing. like, he'll be really sarcastic to people who can't hear him. he also slams stuff. it's been getting on my nerves, since a) i lived with a guy who would do this all the time and b) i hate it when people who play video games are terrible at them. additionally, guy's in a frat and thinks he's pretty rad. it was thus i took my revenge.

i was drunk friday night. i came home from the bar. waiting for the elevator was my neighbor, the game yeller, and a girl i didn't recognize. both tipsy at least. so i decided to cockblock him. here's the conversation.

me: "hey, man. you live next door to me, right?"
guy: "yeah. hey."
me: "dude, you're the one who plays those online games right?"
guy: "well, i used to. not so much anymore."
me: "serious? i hear you yelling at that shit all the time! what are you playing? i hear you screaming about spawn points and shit constantly." we enter the elevator.
guy: "i mean i guess i used to play COD."
me: "shit yeah, COD. what the hell are you yelling at then?"
guy: "well, alex plays-"
me: "the guy across the way? man, i haven't seen him in forever."
guy: "yeah."
me: as if seeing the girl for the first time. "oh, hey. are you john's friend?"
girl: "uh. . .yeah."
me: "cool. alright. later."

i hear the girl leave his room like 10 minutes later.
11   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
dan p. Posted - 04/12/2009 : 6:57:19 PM
call of duty.

for the record, i only ever talk like that when i talk to him, or dudes like him. i do in mockery.
GuitarGuy305 Posted - 04/12/2009 : 11:37:08 AM
The worst cockblockers are children and pets.
gnome44 Posted - 04/12/2009 : 11:12:00 AM
The point was that Dan didn't like his neighbor. He later saw that his neighbor had the opportunity to get laid (which likely doesn't happen too often). Dan took it upon himself to show this lovely lady that maybe this isn't the kind of guy she really wants to put out for... Hence he blocked the dude's cock from getting any action...a cockblock.

He gets extra points on this one for style.

What I want to know is wtf is "COD"?
Hopeful Rolling Waves Posted - 04/12/2009 : 09:31:19 AM
When you made a dude look like a damned idiot in front of the broad he's with.
Ranting Thespian Posted - 04/12/2009 : 04:47:47 AM
. . . I have read this many times. I don't get it. And wtf is a cockblock?
Silky The Pimp Posted - 04/11/2009 : 7:16:07 PM
Dan P. you cock.
Hopeful Rolling Waves Posted - 04/11/2009 : 1:12:09 PM
It must have been so rewarding to spank one out after that!
Kevin Posted - 04/11/2009 : 01:35:17 AM
dick lol
Andre_Brazil Posted - 04/09/2009 : 10:36:50 AM
HAHAUEHAUHUAEHu good one
br1 Posted - 04/09/2009 : 01:34:41 AM
HAhaha. Nice. Good stuff.
SEJK Posted - 04/08/2009 : 9:42:40 PM
lol -- well played!

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