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guitfiddler
Chatterbox
USA
136 Posts |
 Posted - 05/22/2008 : 12:11:48 AM
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| I dont post much but I have a question... I have a friend who has died in the past year. He had a girlfriend when he died who actually found him dead. Some time has passed, and she is acting like a crazy person. Taking every moment to let people know of her recent tragedy, she starts fights with anyone who even remotely looks at her. At what point is it ok to tell her to get over it? To come back to reality? She is ridin this sympathy train right into the ground. Any tips would be appreciated. |
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Eagle Eye
Is Anybody Here?
USA
8 Posts |
Posted - 05/22/2008 : 2:07:25 PM
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I'd venture to say that finding your boyfriend dead is a pretty difficult thing to go through, let alone have to live with day to day. I'm not condoning her actions but I think dealing with that would make anyone a little crazy. It seems she is trying to get sympathy from the people around her and to be honest; it probably makes her feel better to talk about it. Must be a heavy burden to carry.
On the other hand, she could be an attention-seeking bitch in which case it is totally appropriate for you to either tell her to get over it or, and this would be my recommendation, cut all ties and forget about her. Who needs that shit?
I am quite sorry for your loss. Losing a friend is never easy.
Good luck!
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/22/2008 : 6:53:29 PM
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tell someone to get over their dead girlfriend or boyfiend whom the person found dead, is pretty brutal, and i am prepared to call a person who does that a huge asshole.
it's not a question of "over it." probably she's talking about it not to get it off her chest or whatever but to distance herself from it. you talk about things openly if they're not completely tragic or a big deal. the words are like goods, the more there are the less they mean, and by association the words' subject. probably talking about it a lot makes it easier for her to cope. it's probably annoying.
instead of burning that bridge for no good reason, suggest she find another outlet for her grief. does she do any sort of art? writing, drawing, music, whatever?
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death to false metal. |
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Ranting Thespian
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1283 Posts |
Posted - 05/22/2008 : 11:12:07 PM
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| Even a therapist might be able to help. |
Not communicating can hurt more than any word that can be said -
Nick
-the Ranting Thespian |
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Arthen
Alien Abductee
USA
4845 Posts |
Posted - 05/26/2008 : 4:02:03 PM
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| But stay away from analrapists. |
Steve Hackett: "I'm my own opening act, you see."
Tim (before "Faceoff"): "Peace, love....and SEX!"
cbenc41@hotmail.com |
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dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 05/26/2008 : 7:25:04 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Arthen
But stay away from analrapists.
thanks, i'm losing a lot of business as it is. not a ton of repeat customers. |
death to false metal. |
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guitfiddler
Chatterbox
USA
136 Posts |
Posted - 05/27/2008 : 12:50:08 AM
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| She was a little attention seeking b4 he died (drama queen). I have felt bad for even thinking about telling her to get over it. It has been brought to my attention that even her parents felt that she was using this as an excuse to lose control (drugs etc. which is ironically how my friend died). She is in rehab as we speak on suicide watch. When you had the friends that I had growing up, life can seem a little crazy. I thank God that I moved away for college. If I would've stayed with these people, I'd either be where he is, or where she is. Isn't it funny how one decision can dictate the rest of your life? Like the Butterfly Effect |
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Ranting Thespian
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1283 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2008 : 02:31:07 AM
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| I hope she gets the help she needs. |
Not communicating can hurt more than any word that can be said -
Nick
-the Ranting Thespian |
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Hopeful Rolling Waves
Alien Abductee
South Sandwich Islands
2154 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2008 : 6:44:03 PM
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You have to learn how to deal with life and death as a human being. It's the way it is: some can and some can't. Consequently, some can be helped to deal with it, and some can't. Maybe this broad can't, and that's a shame, but that's life.
Way to digress to Arrested Development, Ben. 2 points. |
http://db.etree.org/hopefulrollingwaves/ < My Trading List |
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tact... when does it stop?
