| Author |
 Topic  |
|
|
Jay
Alien Abductee
Vatican City
2279 Posts |
 Posted - 11/07/2007 : 4:22:16 PM
|
All right, close your eyes (well, first imagine that I'm actually talking to you, then imagine that your eyes are closed, m'kay?) It's about 32 degrees, you are bundled up like the kid in Christmas story but still cold because you are standing WAIST DEEP in a pile of wet, soppy snow-covered leaves. On your back, you're wearing a 30 pound backpack blower and your shoulders definately know it. You aim the tube at the pile in front of you, only to have aforementioned wet, sloppy snow-covered leaves slap you in the face. There are bushes, also, that are wet and pokey. The snow turns to muddy, cold slush instantaneously, the ground is so swampy that you sink about six inches with each step. Your only source of warmth is the exhaust pipe on the low-blower. You dry (or really, steam) your gloves on it, but its effects are fleeting and temporary. It takes you and your crew (that makes three...) about an hour to move 15 or 20 feet. And your boss just doesn't understand. He isn't even there. He's in the other truck, miles and miles away, and he has your headphones...your 85 dollar headphones that make the constant whine and burp and grind of three engines a little bit like bearable. The Mexican you work with, the Mexican who will put in a 15 hour day of carrying rocks with a smile on his face, is putting his hand up to his head in the shape of a gun and pulling the trigger. You don't have to know any Spanish to know.
And then, as you admire what you've accomplished (while gassing up, a welcome shoulder-break...), green green lawn with no leaves, flower beds black and beautiful...a fucking gust of wind comes and blows twelve-hundered leaves back over your work and it looks like you've done nothing all day. And this lasts from sun-up to sun-down.
Welcome to November, eh? |
"Hey man...you smell..."
"Oh yeah?"
"yeah...like dinner..." |
|
|
Zachmozach
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1534 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2007 : 11:01:21 AM
|
| Ya for these last two falls of mine have sucked tremendously. I guess I have a trip to Mexico to look forward to though. I've landscaped in poring rain but snow would just be ridiculous. |
 |
 |
|
|
rubylith
Fluffy-Esque
1915 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2007 : 12:21:33 PM
|
I have to rake 88 acres. 
Usually we just drive through the yard (drunk) and crush the som-bitches!
Just kidding...don't drink and drive...crush all the leave you want though. makes good fertalizer. |
|
|
|
Hopeful Rolling Waves
Alien Abductee
South Sandwich Islands
2154 Posts |
|
|
dan p.
Alien Abductee
Uganda
3776 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2007 : 1:17:24 PM
|
| just mow the lawn. chops those motherfuckers up. chops 'em real good. |
death to false metal. |
|
|
|
Jay
Alien Abductee
Vatican City
2279 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2007 : 5:43:44 PM
|
Yeah, it chops em all right... Good fertilizer yes but if there are too many then the grass will die. The costumers we have are mostly filthy rich fuckers in million dollar houses, and they want their shit CLEAN...Blowing leaves isn't hard work really, it's just very monotonous and a general pain in the ass.
Now I'd like an opinion on this...My boss, who happens to be my oldest brother, he's incredibly greedy...The truck we drive (I will NOT drive this thing...) has bad breaks, bald tires, no rear window (he took $300 out of an employee's check to "pay" for it in JULY, still isn't fixed...) a cracked windsheild, bad shocks, no tail lights and expired tags. No Joke. This is our daily work truck. Our low blower, that's the one you push, has had a flat front tire since LAST YEAR. This he will not fix. And now here's the clincher...He's moving into a BRAND NEW fancy house, I mean I'm talking frickin Fancy with a capital F. His wife drives a brand new Pontiac. He drives a BMW. And he wants us to help him move on Sunday, our one day off a week.
|
"Hey man...you smell..."
"Oh yeah?"
"yeah...like dinner..." |
|
|
|
Zachmozach
Fluffy-Esque
USA
1534 Posts |
Posted - 11/09/2007 : 11:16:07 PM
|
| Just think if you were a hunter gatherer you would never have to rake a leaf and you probably wouldn't put in more that twenty hours a week of work either. Sorry just had to throw that in there. |
|
|
|
| |
Topic |
|
|
|
Nevermind...I Hate Leaves.
