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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
 Posted - 08/30/2002 : 8:17:58 PM
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Recently, me and my bro have been faced with one hell of a descision to make. My mom has fallen in love with some one in the army, and he's going to live in Savannah for the next year or so untill he gets shipped to Puerto Rico, where she hopes to move there with him. She wants to take us with her, leaving everything here behind so she can quote, "have everything she loves in her life" with her. That means, leaving friends, school (which, by the way, me and my bro have been going to Oconne County schools since kindergarden) and living down there, then possibly move to Puerto Rico. We could go live with our dad, in his apartment in Athens, but it sucks there. It's too cramped and the people that live in that area are ass holes. Now, we could continue to go to Oconne School systems, if we live in Athens. ( I THINK: If the school found out I'd have to be sent to another system ) I mean, i'm all ready a Junior. I want to graduate from High School with all my friends and teachers. Damn.
"Oh come on boy think-what would Jesus do? He'd shake his head like an angry mother Smoke the boy and said I did what I could do." DMB-Raven |
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Erich with an h
Yak Addict
USA
853 Posts |
Posted - 08/30/2002 : 8:48:26 PM
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im going to assume by the way youre bringing this up that you dont want to go. I think you should talk to your mom about it, and tell her that you want to maybe find an alternative toyou leaving that doesnt compramise her goal nor your life. You can tell her that you respect her decision and love her no matter what, but if she moves and takes you with her she could be putting her cares over her childrens and that would be selfish. It sucks though that the easiest alternative you say would be something youre not fond of either, the idea of living in your fathers area.
Hopefully you find a good middle ground, it would be sad to see you go off somewhere where you might not be happy.
Erich w/ an h
Erichwanh@yahoo.com
Stay Tuned For The New Tim Site.... |
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tericee
Alien Abductee
USA
2579 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2002 : 3:23:54 PM
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Fluffy and I moved around all our lives. I'm not sure how he felt about it, but I thought it was quite an adventure. That's probably why I still do it now as an Air Force officer. Living in Puerto Rico for a couple of years could be a cool adventure, although I've heard the schools there aren't so great.
If you're not leaving (theoretically) until this guy is done in Savannah, you'll be a senior by then, right? Do you or your mom have any good friends that would let you live with them until you've finished high school? (There may be legal ramifications unless your dad lives in the same state, which it sounds like he does. We had issues with that when we moved to Maryland and Fluffy stayed in Virginia to finish high school.)
Does your mom plan to marry this Army guy? If so, you'd be able to go to the DOD school down there and would still get a good education -- albeit away from your lifelong friends. My cousin Juan moved from Arizona to Northern California late in high school; he was really angry about it then, but now -- six years later -- he's glad that he did.
teri 
Did I mention that I finished a marathon? |
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SourGirl
Try A Little Harder
USA
53 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2002 : 7:04:15 PM
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Maybe you should try to take some extra classes to get all your credits to graduate and graduate before they move. I mean you wouldn't be graduating with all your friends but you would be graduating from the school you've been going to since kindergarten. Thats just an idea. And you know change can be a good thing. (Unless its pennies)No j/k, lol. But I do hope everything works out.
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 08/31/2002 : 9:20:52 PM
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Egads!! the exact same thing happened to me. My parents moved to Maryland the summer before my senior year in VA. I know the torture you are going thru. VA was the first place I had lived for more than a year and I finally had friends. I wanted to graduate with them. The whole thing sucked. I like Jason's idea and Teri's was pretty good as well. I would highly suggest trying to stick it out and figure out a way to stay. It sucks to be uprooted at such a crucial TIMe. If your mom cares and loves you, she shouldn't mind putting off the move for 1 year or at least sorting out an alternative so you can stay and finish with your friends. I believe that is an important part of growing up. Accomplishing that goal with your friends around you. AS bad as your dad situation sounds, it might be worth tolerating just so you can stay and finish at your current school. Good luck with all that, it is never an easy situation to sort out. So many factors. I think it would be detrimental to your happiness if you get yanked away right now. I know it was for me. I can't imagine your mom couldn't or wouldn't see that. Seems to me she said she wanted to have all the things she loves with here, but if you get moved to PR prematurely, she may not be so happy with your possible bad attitude and depressed nature that that kind of move could incur. Well, good luck and keep us posted as to what happens. If there is anything we can do feel free to ask. We are always a good support group in TIMes of strife.
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy          |
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2002 : 3:14:27 PM
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Are you planning on attending college? If so, the move to Puerto Rico will not have as big of an impact on you, as you will be somewhere at school most of your time, with exception to a few home visits here and there. Also, if you are planning on going to college, I would say that with you having only one more year left, do what you have to do to stay with your friends in high school now. Not to be a naysayer, but if you have some great friends that you've been around since you were a child, you cannot replace those kinds of bonds and relationships with the people you will meet and be friends with for one year. I'm sorry, but I don't think your mom should even spring this on you at all. This is a shitty situation and a decision that you shouldn't be faced with at all. I understand that people do a lot of things when they are in love, but with the time period being one more year for you, she should not even consider moving until you are done with school. I'm not speaking poorly of your mom, but as any parent will tell you... kids come first. Not only that, but I'd say it's selfish of the man your mom wants to marry to ask to uproot and move your entire family to a foreign country, essentially leaving behind everyone and everything you know, all to accomodate him. It really is just a shitty situation. I'm not telling you what to do... just letting you know what I would if I were faced with the same decision. I hope all works out for you. Please keep us all updated and let us know what's going on.
-J
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2002 : 10:11:27 AM
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I'll say, well put Silky. I agree with what you said. It pains me to see when people treat their children ... well, the way most people treat their children. To me, a child (your own child) should be the most important thing in the world to you. My parents were that way. For that matter, I may (along with my sisters) still be the most important thing to them.
What I'm driving at, I suppose, is that if you aren't one of your mom's most important things in life, maybe you should be so worried about whether or not she moves... If its only a year, then maybe you can find someone to live with... or for that matter, live with your dad. If being cramped and living around assholes is the only thing holding you back from being able to stay with the friends you've grown up all your life with... well, then what's holding you back?
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I am not the albatross of love, I am the human ellipsis. I am dot dot dot. |
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tericee
Alien Abductee
USA
2579 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2002 : 02:25:22 AM
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quote:
...if you have some great friends that you've been around since you were a child, you cannot replace those kinds of bonds and relationships with the people you will meet and be friends with for one year... I'm not speaking poorly of your mom, but as any parent will tell you... kids come first. Not only that, but I'd say it's selfish of the man your mom wants to marry to ask to uproot and move your entire family to a foreign country...
If they are such good friends, moving away shouldn't kill the friendship. I do agree that trying to make friends your senior year of high school is not the best situation in the world, but to say that your lifetime friendships will simply cease to exist just because you move is a little severe.
Also, as a single 35-year old female, I can attest to the fact that finding and keeping the man of your dreams is not the world's easiest task. If this is the man she plans to be with long after HTG and his brother are out of high school and out of the house, she's weighing lifetime loneliness against "momentary" discomfort for her sons. (alternate wording: To HTG's mom, it may seem like he has the rest of his life to look forward to, so one year out of high school is not much of a disturbance. Where for her, the rest of her life is in the balance. )
Side note: Puerto Rico is NOT a foreign country. It may be an island, but everyone there is 100% American citizen.
teri
Did I mention that I finished a marathon? |
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Silky The Pimp
Alien Abductee
3321 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2002 : 02:44:36 AM
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quote:
If they are such good friends, moving away shouldn't kill the friendship. I do agree that trying to make friends your senior year of high school is not the best situation in the world, but to say that your lifetime friendships will simply cease to exist just because you move is a little severe.
Absolutely... friendships go on, but I just meant that there is a big difference between having your best friends with you vs. talking to them on the phone from time to time. I say this only because of personal experience in the matter. My one and only regret thus far in life involves not staying where I should have when I had the chance.
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enthuTIMsiast
Alien Abductee
6990 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2002 : 08:37:50 AM
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quote:
I can attest to the fact that finding and keeping the man of your dreams is not the world's easiest task.
I ssssecond that emo-osshun.
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I am not the albatross of love, I am the human ellipsis. I am dot dot dot. |
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{=HTG=}
Alien Abductee
USA
2342 Posts |
Posted - 09/12/2002 : 9:38:14 PM
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Thank you all for your ideas and concerns. Well, so far nothing new has come from this. My mom is still pretty stubborn about all this and doesnt really listen to what others have to say. She's actually in Savanahh right now looking for an apartment to stay in for a time while we look for "a better place" Me and my bro are keeping our fingers crossed, and i've been heavily considering everyones ideas, but for now i'll just have to wait and see what happenes.
"Oh come on boy think-what would Jesus do? He'd shake his head like an angry mother Smoke the boy and said I did what I could do." DMB-Raven |
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Fluffy
Administrator
USA
10739 Posts |
Posted - 09/13/2002 : 04:51:58 AM
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Good luck my friend, LMK if there is anything I can do. WE are all here and rooting for ya. Good luck, I will keep you in my prayers.
Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy |
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Guy's, sigh* What should I do?
