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T O P I C    R E V I E W
Jay Posted - 07/11/2003 : 5:15:18 PM
Okay...Most people on here know that I love to fish. I'm a catch an release fisherman, I make sure that whenever I catch something that I don't harm it (And no, the hook in it's mouth doesn't really do much) and that it swims away under it's own power. Today, I went to the largest and deepest natural lake in Ohio (Besides lake Erie) which is called Punderson lake and is a whopping...60...acres, but pretty deep (Almsot 70 feet.) So I'm fishing...and this lake is absolutly horrid for fishing...next to this guy...You know the type...I like to call them "Assholes." He's standing there, whipping a giant plastic worm into the water, tangling everything up, and cussing constantly around these young kids (They weren't his, they were fishing next to thier father, who was getting quite angry by this time) This asshole had to be about 18, and he was with his other asshole friend. Both had the average "prep" clothes, i.e. the A&F hats, shirts, etc...Now, for those of you who don't know fishing ethics...You DON'T fish right next to people unless you have to...so basically what that means is that if you are on an expansive 1000 foot beach, you don't set up right next to other fishermen. These guys did. They set up right next to this guy with his young kids.

After about ten minutes, the assholes started to get pissy. The little kids where laughing and having a good old time, running around and playing in the sand. One of the assholes yells "Shut the fuck up!" at these little kids, right in front of thier father. The father was clearly pissed, but he let it go.

Another ten minutes later, the asshole catches a fish. Now, young kids generally want to see caught fish up close, so the youngest kid walks up to the asshole and asks to see it. "Get the fuck away from my fish!" the asshole says. Again, the father is pissed, but he doesn't say a word.

Finally, the assholes begin to talk about gettign blowjobs, sexual things, you know. The father says something along the lines of "Can you two not talk about that in front of my kids?" These assholes say, and this was quite loud, "We'll talk about anything we want to talk about, dick. Why don't you move your ass over to the other side of the beach?" Now, this is where it gets funny.

The father has had enough. I moved in for a closer look, cause I knew something funny was gonna happen. The father stands up, faces the assholes and says "Let me tell you what I'm gonna do." He grabs a container of nightcrawlers (Really big, slimy, sticky worms for those not in the "know") and chucks the entire container on the assholes! There had to be three dozen worms in this thing. Then, as the assholes prepare for thier comeback, the father says "I'm being a bad influence on my kids. But I can't hold this back. I've been listening to you two all day, and I swear if you two say another word to my kids again, I swear to god that not only will I injure you, I will redirect your digestive tracts so you shit out your mouths. So get off the fucking beach before I give you both a fishook castration!!"

They left, I cheered.
5   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
KevinLesko Posted - 07/14/2003 : 6:34:21 PM
Right on father!!!! While I am fairly non-confrintational there certainly are times when something like that just has to be done.
Silky The Pimp Posted - 07/14/2003 : 2:00:23 PM
quote:
I will redirect your digestive tracts so you shit out your mouths. So get off the fucking beach before I give you both a fishook castration!!"


That bears repeating. :)
Saint Jude Posted - 07/12/2003 : 05:23:45 AM
ha, thats great.
Jay Posted - 07/11/2003 : 10:24:37 PM
Damn you Tommy Two Tone! I wish I had a picture of that to show you guys...It was too funny...Capt. P probably remembers...
Fluffy Posted - 07/11/2003 : 5:23:02 PM
Sounds like "assholes" was a good choice of a word!!! HEHE

By the way, why didn't you chime in on the Road Signs post. It took me almost 10 mins to find the answer and you could have answered it immediately. Damn you, damn your eyes!!!!(j/k)

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