| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Admin |
Posted - 12/15/2002 : 3:38:20 PM
Im doing some work on the board so if there are any problems just email me, thanks! |
| 14 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| PJK |
Posted - 01/03/2003 : 06:54:53 AM
"Smile's" back hehehe |
| Fluffy |
Posted - 01/03/2003 : 04:33:51 AM
Jon Soldo, do you know anything about what this means? |
| PJK |
Posted - 12/23/2002 : 10:15:01 PM
If this was the person resposible for my missing"smile" I say....Burn the F'n witch!!!! |
| Fluffy |
Posted - 12/23/2002 : 10:08:48 PM
BURN THE WITCH!!!
FIRST VILLAGER
We have found a witch. May we burn her?
ALL
A Witch! Burn her!
BEDEVERE
How do you know she is a witch?
ALL
She looks like one. Yes, she does.
BEDEVERE
Bring her forward.
They bring her forward - a beautiful YOUNG GIRL (MISS ISLINGTON) dressed up
as a witch.
WITCH
I am not a witch. I am not a witch.
BEDEVERE
But you are dressed as one.
WITCH
They dressed me up like this.
ALL
We didn't, we didn't!
WITCH
This is not my nose, It is a false one.
BEDEVERE takes her nose off.
BEDEVERE
Well?
FIRST VILLAGER
... Well, we did do the nose.
BEDEVERE
The nose?
FIRST VILLAGER
And the hat. But she is a witch.
ALL
A witch, a witch, burn her!
BEDEVERE
Did you dress her up like this?
FIRST VILLAGER
... Um ... Yes ... no ... a bit ... yes... she has got a wart.
BEDEVERE
Why do you think she is a witch?
SECOND VILLAGER
She turned me into a newt.
BEDEVERE
A newt?
SECOND VILLAGER
(After looking at himself for some time)
I got better.
ALL
Burn her anyway.
BEDEVERE
Quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
ARTHUR and PATSY ride up at this point and watch what follows with interest
ALL
There are? Tell up. What are they, wise Sir Bedevere?
BEDEVERE
Tell me ... what do you do with witches?
ALL
Burn them.
BEDEVERE
And what do you burn, apart from witches?
FOURTH VILLAGER
... Wood?
BEDEVERE
So why do witches burn?
SECOND VILLAGER
(pianissimo)
... Because they're made of wood...?
BEDEVERE
Good.
PEASANTS stir uneasily then come round to this conclusion.
ALL
I see. Yes, of course.
BEDEVERE
So how can we tell if she is made of wood?
FIRST VILLAGER
Make a bridge out of her.
BEDEVERE
Ah ... but can you not also make bridges out of stone?
ALL
Ah. Yes, of course ... um ... err ...
BEDEVERE
Does wood sink in water?
ALL
No, no, It floats. Throw her in the pond Tie weights on her. To
the pond.
BEDEVERE
Wait. Wait ... tell me, what also floats on water?
ALL
Bread? No, no, no. Apples .... gravy ... very small rocks ...
ARTHUR
A duck.
They all turn and look at ARTHUR. BEDEVERE looks up very impressed.
BEDEVERE
Exactly. So... logically ...
FIRST VILLAGER
(beginning to pick up the thread)
If she ... weighs the same as a duck ... she's made of wood.
BEDEVERE
And therefore?
ALL
A witch! ... A duck! A duck! Fetch a duck.
FOURTH VILLAGER
Here is a duck, Sir Bedevere.
BEDEVERE
We shall use my largest scales.
He leads them a few yards to a very strange contraption indeed, made of
wood and rope and leather. They put the GIRL in one pan and the duck
in another. Each pan is supported by a wooden stave. BEDEVERE checks
each pan then ... ARTHUR looks on with interest.
BEDEVERE
Remove the supports.
Two PEASANTS knock them away with sledge hammers. The GIRL and the duck
swing slightly but balance perfectly.
ALL
A witch! A witch!
WITCH
It's a fair cop.
All
Burn her! Burn her! Let's make her into a ladder.
The VILLAGERS drag the girl away, leaving ARTHUR and BEDEVERE regarding
each other admiringly.
BURN THE WITCH!!!! |
| victorwootenfan |
Posted - 12/23/2002 : 10:45:19 AM
in my hungover state of mind right now that's the funniest damned thing in the world!! |
| Fluffy |
Posted - 12/23/2002 : 05:50:58 AM
I hear that complaint all the TIMe, "Fluffy, it looks like it's getting SMALLER!!"
DAMMIT |
| enthuTIMsiast |
Posted - 12/16/2002 : 1:59:56 PM
yeah, actually I haven't noticed anything new either. |
| Silky The Pimp |
Posted - 12/16/2002 : 1:29:46 PM
So uhh... what changed? |
| enthuTIMsiast |
Posted - 12/16/2002 : 10:37:56 AM
Oh, I do have one suggestion... Since we now have flood control, it would be nice for there to be a clock or something we could see so we'd know how long we have to wait to post. I know I know, flood control might have something to do with me but even now when I type some stuff, I get hit with the message, even when I'm actually saying something relevant and whatnot. So if we knew how long we had to wait, that'd be spectacular. Don't know exactly how it would work, tho... |
| enthuTIMsiast |
Posted - 12/16/2002 : 10:32:44 AM
The font is still the same size for me. Guess everything's not getting smaller... |
| PJK |
Posted - 12/15/2002 : 7:52:42 PM
Hey Erich, thanks for being on line last night....and writing your "sent" message....I was feeling pretty much alone with that creep and it was such a relief to see your post! |
| Erich |
Posted - 12/15/2002 : 7:33:44 PM
you got it 
can we suggest an ignore function? |
| pcbTIM |
Posted - 12/15/2002 : 6:49:19 PM
Anyone else notice that everything is slowly getting smaller? First the guitars, now the print. Pretty soon we won't be able to read anything at all. Hmmmmm....I wonder how small the size 1 font is....pretty damn small |
| Fleabass76 |
Posted - 12/15/2002 : 5:22:22 PM
Note to self...don't freak out and break things if something's wrong w/ the board...CHECK. |
