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T O P I C    R E V I E W
Jay Posted - 06/21/2002 : 01:34:11 AM
I'm working on this story.

It was early summer, when the days where long and the nights short. The clear skies always showed every star in the sky, unless you where in town. There, light pollution prevented your eyes from seeing many stars. In the backyard of my good friend’s house, the light pollution got so bad in the summer that seeing the big dipper was rare.
That summer I had spent most of my free time sleeping and listening to music. Once and a while, and this is once or twice a week, I would ride in the passenger seat of my parent’s cars (albeit one at a time) to David’s house. The entire ride there would be in awkward silence, broken only by a horrible song quietly playing on the radio. I’d be dressed for school, with my black guitar in my black guitar case; ready to blare those old folk tunes I loved so much. I never really got to play it, though, because David didn’t like it. He had been trying (not as hard as he could have been trying) to play bass for a while, but he didn’t trust me in that you have to play with people and listen to music to play good. Some folks think that skills just fall in your lap, I guess. I used to think that, but after a while, I realized that I had to at least try to get what I wanted. I was never a worker, but I tried. Most of the time, whatever I wanted would come easily. It was natural sometimes.
After finding my way down David’s driveway, avoiding any contact with anyone but him, we would sit and talk for a while, just before going on a walk. Music would be playing in the background while David babbled on about what happened to him, interrupting me whenever I brought one of my many grievances up. These conversations usually consisted of this, first goes David, then I:

“ How’s it going champ?”
“ Good, I guess.” (I’d have my guitar in my hands for approximately three seconds before this:)
“ Can you put your guitar away for now, I wanna talk.”
“ But you told me to bring it.”
“ I know, but it’s antisocial.”
“How?”
“ Cause you aren’t talking to me.”
“ Yes I am.”
“ But you don’t listen to me when you play that.”
“ Yes I do it’s-“
“ OH! Did I tell you what happened on Tuesday?”
“ You interrupted me. You aren’t listening, chum!”
“ Sorry. Well, anyway, John and Phil went to get ice cream, and that got in this fight, and then, like, they threw their ice cream at Jim! He got so pissed, and it started running down his shirt! God that must have sucked! C’mon, put the guitar down, you didn’t even hear my story!”
“ Yes I did. I have a similar one, it happen on Tuesday, too. We were-“
“ And then Jim got so mad that he started to turn all red! It was so funny, mostly because it was Jim, you know. God that must-“
“ You int-“
‘ Stop interrupting! You aren’t even listening!”
“ I am I’m just trying to show y-“
“ Want to go on a walk?”
“ Sure.”
And so, off we would go. It was always well past curfew (At least with the black and white police force we had, thirty seconds after curfew is still after curfew, you know!) when we left. It just wasn’t fun to go past the back yard before then. We would find a spot to sit, lighting David’s stolen cigarettes. This is when the true conversations would start. No interruptions, just taking about whatever was on our minds. Philosophy wasn’t unheard of with us, we often times traveled well into the depths of intellectual thought, procuring various theories and thoughts. This would continue for approximately forty-five minutes, when, after this time and depending on the weather, we would retire to the darkness of his basement, or to a bench behind the barn. Yes, the “barn” was really a garage, but who uses them for cars anymore? This garage was an entire building altogether, so it is only fair to call it a barn.
Here we would sit for another two hours, talking, until we decided to do something else.

At one time, we decided to go to the high school track, and sit in the woods in our special spot. It was there, nearly thirty years ago, that I could honestly say that I was frightened beyond belief.
The human body reacts to fear. I am stated the obvious when I say that, but it is necessary to understand that fear takes over. No one person can not know fear at least once in his or her lifetime. I am talking about real fear, not movie-scared. Movie-scared is like when you are about to crash on your bike. Real fear is when you are riding in a car and the brakes fail while going down a hill on a congested highway. Then, above this, is the type of fear where you are frightened instantly, and then scared for the rest of your life afterwards.

After our usual happenings, David and I would trudge to wherever we wanted to go. This was usually around two in the morning. This particular morning found us traveling to the high school running track. We would go to the rear end of the loop, and back into the woods. A few cylinders of rolled chain-link fence stood right above our place, on top of a dangerous hill. The reason I say the hill was dangerous was that it dropped suddenly, and tons of scrap cement blocks stood waiting for someone to fall on them.

That's all i have now. If anyone accually read that, I'd love to knwo what you think, even if you think it's crap...

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
15   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
pcbTIM Posted - 06/28/2002 : 9:43:38 PM
quote:

That's pretty cool. I could never do that. I'm too private or something...I'd be afraid someone would get it and read it and I'd feel stupid.

-what-



I feel the same way.....one TIMe one of my friends read some of my lyrics.....and when he said they weren't bad....I said "No way....they suck".....because in fact.....they do.

"I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows."
My_Bad_Side Posted - 06/25/2002 : 11:20:39 PM
I'd probably be more likely just to post it directly here and not keep it anywhere else...Just kinda let this be my log of what I'd written. That way it wouldn't just show up on my computer and be all ...here's what I think ... and all that.

No one understands me.
Jay Posted - 06/25/2002 : 02:26:35 AM
This is the first TIMe I've ever let people read my stuff...i usually never do, but I feel comfortable here, so i jsut decided what the hell! Thanks for reading it, dude!

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
enthuTIMsiast Posted - 06/25/2002 : 01:22:56 AM
That's pretty cool. I could never do that. I'm too private or something...I'd be afraid someone would get it and read it and I'd feel stupid.

-what-
Jay Posted - 06/25/2002 : 01:20:03 AM
No. I've written aboot 15 five to tne page sotries jsut for fun. It's almost as good as playing music, for me at least!

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
enthuTIMsiast Posted - 06/25/2002 : 12:38:50 AM
Interesting Jay. Better than the plumbing equipment or controlling cheese piece. Is this for submission into a short story contest or what?

-what-
Fluffy Posted - 06/24/2002 : 12:07:41 AM
I look forward to seeing more. Post when you have some TIMe.

Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy
Jay Posted - 06/23/2002 : 3:43:26 PM
Yes, i've read all of the songs and poems there a few times over. They are so much better than me at this stuff. It's really great to be able to share your creative writings with people that you know won't jsut say, " that sucks." I normally don't even show my family what i write, but here I'm comfortable with it, and it seems like everyone else is, too. Just another reason why i love it here!

I have some more written, but I'm not gonna post it until i Have the entire thing finished.

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
Fluffy Posted - 06/23/2002 : 07:27:29 AM
Hey Jay, did you check out some of the other folks contributions?

http://www.timreynolds.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=745



Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy
Captain Petersburgh Posted - 06/21/2002 : 10:18:18 PM
Abe was me second guess. i kinda guessed it from the Bass and the Hard-on Track

i'm keepin' TIMe with my own set of keys....
Jay Posted - 06/21/2002 : 10:14:57 PM
David is accually Abe, and the person telling the story is me. THanks for reading brotha!

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
Captain Petersburgh Posted - 06/21/2002 : 10:08:41 PM
i really liked it jay. i know i'm probably wrong but daive reminds me of me when u and i hang out. i'm sorry. anyway i really loved hos u described everything and how it seemed dreary and haw the openin' scenes went. really cool.

P.S lay off the weed

i'm keepin' TIMe with my own set of keys....
Jay Posted - 06/21/2002 : 12:45:57 PM
Thanks for reading it Fluffy! The rest will probably be posted tonite or tomorrow. I figured there would be a few errors in it, cause grammar and puncuation mean nothing to me when i've been up for 28 hours, and in desparate need of sleep...thanks though man!

Jay
" It's a scavenger hunt in the best of times, a one armed man with a box of dimes. Throw the stick and let the bulldog roll." KJP
Fluffy Posted - 06/21/2002 : 02:33:28 AM
We had a thread similar to this back in the day. I thought you might want to check it out other people from the boards contributions. Here is the link:

http://www.timreynolds.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=745

Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy
Fluffy Posted - 06/21/2002 : 02:29:40 AM
I really liked it. I noticed lots of grammatical and punctuation flaws but those can all be fixed. Teri would probably be happy to give it the once over and fix it for you. I could do it as well but I am sure Teri would be much better at it. I might miss something. It reminded me of 2 things strangely. One being a song written by my friend Frank which is actually a poem put to music. It really reminds me of that. It is called "The Borges Parallel". It also reminds me of a short story on the back of a Genesis Live album. If you read it I am not sure you or anyone would agree, but for some reason they seem very similar to me. I can't really explain it. TR and I have discussed the short story on the back of the Genesis album on a number of occasions. TR is a huge (old)Genesis fan and that was also one of his fave Genesis albums. Anyway, I am rambling, so I will anxiously await the rest or the final draft. Keep up the good work.

Peace & Keep the Faith
Fluffy

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